Teenage girls talk about anxiety: 'It's always linked to failure'

- August 07, 2025

“It’s always linked to failure.” This powerful insight from a teenage girl reflects a deeply felt connection between anxiety and the fear of not meeting expectations. Here’s what research and lived experiences reveal:

What’s Behind the Link Between Anxiety and Failure for Teen Girls

1. Academic and Gendered Pressures

Teen girls often feel a disproportionate pressure to excel academically, with scant tolerance for mistakes:

One qualitative study found girls expressing that “if a boy fails… it’s not that bad, but I feel like if a girl does, it means a lot more.” Academic expectations are layered with emotional intensity—making failure feel heavier and more personal. BioMed Central
A review of global studies highlighted how anxiety among girls is closely tied to pressures to perform, succeed, and secure a “good” future—making failure feel catastrophic. EurekAlert!

2. Perfectionism and Self-Worth

The need to be flawless can fuel anxiety:

Adolescents with maladaptive perfectionism often tie their self-esteem to achievement. If standards aren’t met, this gap can spiral into self-criticism and anxiety. PMCWikipedia
According to the self-worth theory, school performance isn’t just grades—it’s a shield for self-esteem. Falling short isn’t merely disappointing—it threatens their sense of worth. Wikipedia

3. Comparison and Social Media

Beyond grades, girls face constant comparison:

Platforms like Instagram and TikTok amplify unrealistic ideals of success and appearance, reinforcing that anything less than perfect is failure. BioMed Centralbrainbalancecenters.com
These environments heighten emotional strain through social comparison, insecurity, disrupted sleep, and relentless pressure to present a flawless self. brainbalancecenters.comochealthpsych.com

Why “Failure” Weighs So Heavily

For many teen girls, failing—or even the possibility of not being their absolute best—triggers anxiety because it threatens their identity, self-worth, and future prospects. This isn’t just about grades; it's about being seen, valued, and worthy.

What Can Help

Type of Support	How It Helps
Open Conversation	Validates girls’ experiences, reduces shame, normalizes imperfection.
Mental Health Education	Teaching tools like CBT can help reframe thoughts tied to fear of failure. ADAA
Balanced Expectations	Emphasizing growth and effort over perfection can foster resilience.
Media & Emotional Literacy	Strengthening critical awareness of social media narratives reduces harmful comparison.

This insight—“anxiety is always linked to failure”—is more than a feeling; it's a reflection of the pressures teen girls face in performance-focused environments. Understanding and responding to it with empathy and support can make a real difference.

If you’d like, we can explore resources, coping strategies, or supportive programs tailored for young girls.